We're Going to Die
by Aquarius Angel
Summary: "We're going to die." Logan said. And again all that I could think of is that I am going to die a virgin


Title: We're Going to Die

Author: Aquarius Angel

E-mail: NC-17

Continuity: set after X2, no X3 spoilers

Summery: "We're going to die." Logan said. And again all that I could think of is that I am going to die a virgin…

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the X-men characters, etc.

Author Note: This is part of a Wolverine/Rogue Challenge Generator: I got We're Going to Die…Let's have sex/Television. This is what I came up with!

* * *

It was weird. After Jean died Logan stayed. I mean really stayed. He would wonder off for a weekend here and there, sometimes a week if the mansion got too overwhelming. But he never ran again. And I found it weird. The Wolverine in my head was always trying to get me to run, and that was just a small part of what I knew Logan must be facing all the time in his head. Wolverines were not meant to stay in one place for long, they liked their space and ability to roam and hunt. But Logan stayed at the mansion, and even took on a few classes and other odd jobs around to stay busy. He become a second in command and even ran his own missions if needed. And he fulfilled his promise to protect me.

I was use to having to deal with difficult situations myself. When people would not include me because of my skin, or when I was teased for my accent or random acts from the other voices in my head, I became accustomed to dealing with the teases and being left out. I could not help that I was from Mississippi, though I was losing the heaviness of my accent the longer I stayed in New York. I also could not always help it when the other voices and beings in my head took over and I was left looking crazy for growling or knowing how to speak German to perfection. But when Logan stayed everything changed. I was never made fun of or excluded from actives. I was always asked to join in with the others, though I would at times decline, because it was just too dangerous with my lethal skin. I knew the changes in the students were because of Logan's presence and though that bugged me a little bit, I felt cared for since Logan was looking out for my feelings.

Going back to the mansion was hard for everyone. The invasion was in everyone's mind, since we all thought that we were safe at Xavier's School for the Gifted. However we were all wrong. Striker was smart enough to have all of the dead bodies removed, but most of the school had to be rebuilt or at least puttied and painted. It took time, but time allowed all of the students and teachers to come to grasp with Jean's death and how this attack could be repeated. The Professor took the time to upgrade the security system and the students started taking defense classes from Logan. We would defiantly be more prepared next time. And all the while Logan was there doing whatever was needed of him. Through out all the rebuilding and preparing, I knew he was watching me the most.

I dealt with the situation the best among the oldest students. Considering I had voices in my head that had dealt with worse events (i.e. concentration camps and mutant surgeries), this seemed rather easy to handle. The younger students turned to me for advice on how to approach Scott or how they could help in the recovery. Some even cried on my shoulder and told me how scared they were. The older students found me comforting, since I did not break down into tears every time Jean or the intrusion was mentioned. Bobby turned to me for everything, once he finally got out of bed. His innocence was lost over the whole experience, and he "needed" me to hold him, pat his back, and tell him how everything was going to be all right. And the adults well they would nod at me and told me how much they appreciated my efforts in recovering the school. Only Logan knew how hard it got for me to handle at times.

He spent most of his free time watching me, which seemed more often than I knew could be possible, since he was very busy with the rebuilding of the mansion. He would nod at me from across the dinning hall, or grasp my hand as I walked past him and spend the next few minutes checking on my day and such. It took me four weeks to break down. The mansion was almost finished, Scott had finally started teaching again, the students were getting back into a pattern, and Bobby could last a full day without falling completely apart. However it finally hit me.

It was late and I was just sitting there, I think the television was on, but I could not tell you what was on or what it was saying. I just remember knowing that my world could have ended and I would still be a virgin. Really random, I know but that is what I was thinking. How I could have died at least five times over those three days without ever sharing a bed with a man. I just broke down crying, and I do not mean silent tears either, I was all out bawling. That is how Logan found me, sitting in front of a television and bawling.

"Marie what's wrong?"

I did not even bother looking at him, I just answered through my tears. "We're going to die…(sniff)….lets have sex." I was crying so hard I'm not even sure what I said, but much latter Logan told me that was what he heard.

Logan looked at me funny, looked at the television, and then sat down next to me and pulled me onto his lap. "Darlin' you got to calm down and start talking sense." I didn't calm down, but Logan kept holding me until I fell asleep in his arms. He then carried me up to his room and laid me down on his bed, and even took off my shoes and socks.

When I woke up around two in the morning screaming, he was there holding me again. I was shaking and my heart was pounding. Logan whispered calming verses into my hair as I clung to him. When my heart stopped pounding and my death grip eased, he relaxed his own grip on me.

"How long?" It was a simple question, but I was afraid to answer, knowing he would be upset.

"Since the first time," I stopped him from commenting, but he pulled me closer into his embrace. "But this one was my own." He raised an eyebrow as a way of asking me explain. "I have both yours and Magneto's nightmares, but since the invasion I have been having mine own." An involuntary shiver went down my spin and I clung to Logan more. "I dream of not surviving the invasion, of falling out of the X-jet and Kurt not being there to save or worse both of us start falling, and the worse one is when we all die because Stryker succeeded. I know that they aren't true, not like your and Erik's, but they were so close to becoming true that it scares me. I wake up and just start wondering the mansion, and when that doesn't work I force myself to stay awake for a few days at a time. That's probably why I finally cracked tonight."

"Marie, there is nothing to be scared of, you are safe here with me."

"No Logan, I'm not." I said forcefully while I pulled out of his embrace. "You were here during the attack, if it wouldn't have been for Siren's scream I wouldn't have awoke up and I could have been taken with the others. You can't all ways protect me, none of us are safe anywhere we go. There will always be people who hate us for just existing. Everything is NOT going to be okay!" I was crying again and yelling at him for my insecurities. "Jean is fucking dead Logan, the school was ATTACKED! I could have died, AGAIN! We could have died!" I made this last point while poking my finger into his chest. I also couldn't stop the tears that kept running down my eyes.

Logan just took me back into his arms, and held me tight. "Let it all out baby. Cry until there are no more tears, darlin'. I understand." I fell back asleep in Logan's arms and this time I did not wake up, well at least not until almost noon the next morning. Thankfully it was a Saturday, in which most of the mansion went to the zoo for the afternoon, a trip I had already refused to go on. Logan and I made ourselves some sandwiches and talked, but not about my break down.

After that night I was fine, but Logan stayed anyway. I remember before that night feeling him watching me and waiting, probably for my big break down like he could smell the tension in me. And I thought that once I broke down he would finally take off and pick up his search. But he did not leave, and as I have previously stated it was weird.

Life returned to normal around the mansion. And by normal I mean normal for a mansion filled with mutants ranging from the age of about ten to seventy or so. New mutants came and went. Dr. Hank aka Beast, joined the adult crew, and became the resident doctor. He was cool for a big intellectual hairy guy. There was also this Gambit guy for a while, smooth talker, tried to get me into his bed but I just smiled, flirted, and kept him at arms length. He also flirted with every other girl at the mansion, so it was not like I felt special or anything, plus Logan hated him. Something about being a cheat and smooth talker, he tended to mumble to me whenever I asked him why he disliked Gambit so much. Oh Bobby and I broke up, sometime after the whole Jean and his innocence dieing fiasco. We grew apart and though we attempted to mend our withered relationship it just did not work. He went off to college with Kitty and though they both come back often, I know that it would have never worked out for the two of us. I watched a lot of my friends go off, some to schools, some got married, some just left, and a few, like myself, stayed. I got a teaching degree from a local college that I commute too. Xavier took me on as a teacher, and that is what I have been doing for the past three years.

It has been nine years since Jean's death, eight years and eleven months since my last break down. Surprisingly it has been that long since I feared dieing or rather the fact that I could die; until it all shattered with one television program.

It was common to find Logan and myself watching late-night television together. We did it often, though we never became some sort of couple, it was understood that we were close. Close like if you get within three feet of him/her, she/he will gut you with their highly trained hunting skills. It is not my fault that I claim him as mine, and vise versa, or that I am highly jealous of other girls, because he is the one that gave me that trait. Well anyway back to that night. We were sitting there watching T.V. and drinking, another common thing to find us doing. We only drank really late, when all but a select few of the kids were asleep, or on nights like tonight when the mansion is extremely quite (the students were either back home for the winter break, or up at the Professor's skiing cabin for a retreat, we were selected to watch over the mansion at night and join the crew later the next day). We were taking this very rare opportunity to drink heavily. I mean we had bottles of Southern Comfort, Jack Daniels, and some kind of vodka that by the time we started drinking it neither one of us could remember what it was called. We had to drink fast other wise we would not get drunk, or rather Logan would not get drunk, and there I would be drunk by myself. So we were already deep into our bottles when whatever was on the television caught our attention, well probably because it was flashing in big red letters "THE WORLD IS ENDING" over and over. We looked at each other sort of laughing and sort of shock.

"We're going to die." Logan said.

And again all that I could think of is that I am going to die without ever having sex. I know that I am 25 and still a virgin, but you try getting some when you have lethal skin. So what else could I do, besides taking another gulp of Southern Comfort and honestly said to Logan. "Let's have sex."

He quirked an eyebrow at me, but I was already sliding off the couch grabbing up whatever bottles we had left that were semi-full and leading him up the stairs. When we made it halfway up the stairs, I stopped Logan. I was three steps above him, so at a perfect height to kiss him, and I did. Oh…I forgot to mention that I finally figured out how to control my skin. Actually, I was not completely sure if I had figured it out, but I tried it out anyway, knowing that Logan would be able to handle it if I could not handle a simple kiss. It took him a few minutes to realize that I was kissing and touching him with nothing separating or protecting us. He then pulled me closer to him and kissed me like I was the only thing keeping him grounded. We never broke from the kiss, until we were both lying on his bed breathless and half dressed.

He must have sobered up some by then, because before he continued in unbuttoning my pants he looked me straight in the eye, "You know we are not going to die right?"

"Right," I said while pulling his lips back to mine and encouraging him to continue unbuttoning my pants. He continued with undressing me, but would not let the conversation drop.

"Seriously Marie, the television was lying it was probably just a test or a program or something."

"Logan I know, but that does not mean I don't want to have sex right now."

"But we are not going to die."

"So?" I asked looking at him with one of his own classic eyebrow quirking expression on my face. I was naked as the day I born and lying in his bed. He was just as naked, what can I say I can multitask, over me as he tried to form a reasonable argument for us to not follow thru with this. "We are still going to have sex."

When he just stayed above me looking at me like he was not sure what to do with me now that he had me in his bed, I started taking matters into my own hand, quite literary. I started stroking him, "Logan stop thinking." I purred as he harden in my hand.

He started growling at the pleasure I was giving him unwillingly, and pulled my hand off of him as he started kissing me again. Then he started exploring me with his hands. Starting with my face, going down over my shoulders, lightly going over my breasts, and finally down to my stomach and belly button. He took his lips from mine and started kissing where his right hand been, though when he reached my breast he kissed the nipple hard, until it got hard and I was panting for more. His left hand traveled from my side back up to my other breast, which he gently stroked. After a few more seconds he looked up and smirked at me.

"Want more darlin'?"

"You know I do." I said as I arched my entire body up into his. He smirked as he moved his head to kiss my other beast. By body reacted violently seeking more of his kisses and touch. His hand moved back down my body, and did not stop until he was massaging its way between my thighs, which I gladly opened for him to enter. He stroked me, until I screamed in pleasure.

I did not know what happened, mostly because Logan would not let me rest. After I climaxed, he calmed his stroking and started kissing my lips again, but the moment I started coming down from my orgasm he started stroking me hard again.

"This time it will be both of us Marie." He said as my body started heating up all over.

"Yes Logan, I want you." I said as I pulled him up to kiss me, and started encouraging him to enter me. "And not because we are going to die."

He smirked and had the balls to say, "At least we will be going out with a bang." as he entered my secret folds. It felt weird, and he let me adjust to the fact that he was now inside me, but not for long. He started moving and kissing me and it was not long before we both climaxed together.

We fell to earth in each others arms, our hearts beating as one. He looked at me with this looked that screamed 'You are mine', which set my entire body screaming for more. I know he could tell, because he started smiling at me. I mean a real smile, not a smirk, a smile.

"I can't darlin', that was wicked strong, and you are already going to be pissed at me in the morning." He started kissing me gentle, and pulled out slowly. I groaned with his removal, and realized what he meant with being pissed at him in the morning. I was never going to be able to ski in this condition. But his kisses made up for it.

"Marie get some sleep." He said as he spooned behind me, holding me tight. "Your skin is so soft."

My skin, I did not even think about it. He had touched me more tonight than anyone ever had since I was a baby. I snuggled deeper into his hold, and feel asleep in the arms of the man that I loved.

When I woke up, Logan was not there and my first reaction was that he ran. But then I noticed the shower running, and calmly fell back asleep. I was awoken again by kisses that were so light that I felt like I was dreaming them, until he kissed my lips and I succeeded in deepening it. He was still wrapped in a towel, which I quickly removed as I pulled him back to bed. As I sat up I could feel the soreness but did not care, I had more important things on my mind. I pulled him back to the bed and this time I straddled him. He was smirking, but when I started kissing his chest that smirk vanished quickly. I slowly allowed his cock to enter me, as I started moving on top of him. It was a slow lazy process, but the end result was an amazing climax. He started touching me as I rode him, which sent my senses crazy and got me grinding into him so hard that he was deep with in me, which made him go crazy. When the climax hit neither one of us could move.

He finally rolled me to his side, while he kissed and stroked me like a kitten. I purred into his kisses and touch, but he did not take it further than that.

"Marie, we have to go to the ski lodge, sometime today."

"I know." I whispered on the verge of sleep.

"Um…Do you also know that what happened tonight means you always be sharing my bed?"

With my eyes closed I smiled, "Yea sugar I know that too."

He kissed me gently and pulled me against his chest as he whispered his last question. "Do you know that I love you?"

My smiled deepened, and I opened my eyes to look into his. "I know that too."

"Do you?" He asked as he started tickling my still sensitive skin.

I was giggling and barely able to breath, when he took me into the bathroom, and threw me into a cold shower. But I managed to pull him in with me. We were both prunes when we finally got clean and dried off.

I had to leave his room to go get clothes from my own down the hall, but it gave me a moment to realize what all happened. I thought again that we were going to die, and how I wanted to have sex. But most of all I thought of why was the television the only object I can recall being in the room whenever this thought enters my mind.

Logan found me pulling a sweater over my head. "Ready yet?"

"Just a few more minutes." I walked into my own bathroom and quickly brush through my hair, dabbed a little make up on my face, and grab my purse from the handle and walk over to where Logan was leaning against my door frame. "I have a request." I said as I stood in front of him.

He stood straight, "What is that darlin'?"

"Next time either one of us think we are going to die, and want to have sex. Can we have sex on the television?" I asked as innocently as I could with my weird requested.

He smirked and pulled me closer to him. "Why not, it will be kinky and weird, but if that is what you want." He shrugged his shoulders and kissed me like he was never going to let me go. When he ended the kiss, which left me breathless and dizzy, he smirked again and continued, "On top of the T.V., does it matter what is on it? Or can it be off?" I glared at him, gently hit him with my purse as I started walking out of my room.

So Logan stayed and it was weird. That is until we both got drunk, we both sort of freaked about dieing, even though he supposedly can not die, and had awesome sex, became a couple, got married, had two point five kids, and lived happily ever after. Or rather after we finally said screw the nonsense of needing to be scarred about dieing and just had sex on a television set anyway did we really live happily ever after.


End file.
